Do you wonder if you are sad or depressed? Like many people, you may think you are depressed when you are experiencing a period of sadness, or sad when you are actually struggling with more serious depression. Intense sadness and depression have many overlapping signs and are similar in many ways. Sadness often accompanies a sense of mourning. Understandably, most people feel sad after experiencing the loss of a loved one, career or a cherished position. In this circumstance, you know what you are sad about and you do not doubt your sense of loss. You experience time differently, as it seems to move much slower, and you have less energy for the people and things that you once engaged with pleasure. Your sleeping and eating habits may change, becoming excessive or restricted. You may experience the sensation of being on a different planet than others, drifting through life without fully engaging with the tasks and responsibilities at hand. All your energy is being used to mourn the actual loss you have experienced. You might try and care for yourself as you allow the sadness, denial, anger and other difficult feelings to emerge, without judgment, because you are grieving some form of connection or love.
When the Symptoms Signal Depression
Many of the above-mentioned experiences are also symptoms of depression. However, depression carries added self-criticism, self-abuse and an unreasonable expectation of punishment that goes along with low self-esteem. When struggling with depression, you feel intense grief and loss, but you do not know what you are grieving. The loss is not currently identifiable or tangible. You may feel terribly sad some days and not know why.
Frustration and anger come to the surface suddenly, making you wonder about your moods, which may feel out of your control. On top of the above conflicts and frustrations, you berate yourself for your pain and your low self-esteem. You blame yourself or others for the difficulties you are having with your moods. Your work and relationships suffer. You dislike yourself more often than not, and when you’re not disappointed in yourself, you feel let down by others. Your frustration may feel intense and overwhelming at times, and to push these awful emotions out of your mind and declare, “Today I’m going to focus on the positive. I will not let anything get me down.” However, refusing to acknowledge your emotions will not help you in the slightest. If the above symptoms sound familiar, you may be struggling with more than just passing sadness. In depression treatment, I help you come to terms with the difficult thoughts and emotions that you have been trying to evacuate to no avail.
It Is Okay to Struggle With Difficult Emotions
Feeling awful does not make you bad and having a “negative” feeling – anger, frustration, sadness, fear, jealousy or even envy – does not make you awful. You don’t have to blame yourself for the emotions that arise within you.
Self-esteem develops out of an acceptance and awareness of your inner emotions, thoughts and wishes. This is a developmental issue, and all people begin the process at birth. If you have not had the experience of feeling understood and accepted for who you are – all of you, difficult emotions included – you probably instead experienced disregard for the very stuff that leads one to develop self-esteem and self-acceptance. A part of yourself may feel empty or depressed because you have not had the needed attention and support for your unique, complex humanity. Depression treatment can help build self-esteem and diminish your depression.
There Is Another Way
Denial is not an effective emotional defense. It literally kills the vital energy and life that resides inside of you. The first step toward healing depression is to talk to trained therapist, who is interested in your experience and can listen carefully without passing judgment or giving instructions.You need someone to help you gain access to your inner vitality that has been inhibited. It takes courage and perseverance to come to terms with painful and frightening emotions. By acknowledging and talking about all aspects of yourself, even the parts that you may dislike the most, you can find relief from depression.
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